


Till then, Till eternity.

by softwoohyun



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Mentions of Blood, Mentions of Rape, Self-Harm, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-03-29 23:59:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13938228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softwoohyun/pseuds/softwoohyun
Summary: Woohyun blamed himself for his father's rage, for stealing his father's happiness.





	1. Till then, I'll love you

**Author's Note:**

> This fic has trigger warnings and mentions of rape and blood. If you are not comfortable please do not read it.  
> Comments are welcomed!  
> This fic is also posted on aff

_‘You are disgusting’_

_‘No one wants you’_

_‘Can’t you just die?’_

_‘You’re a freak’_

**_‘You’re a mistake’_ **

He clutched his ears shut, no longer able to tolerate his surroundings. Those words he hears every so often ever since he could remember. He hugged his knees close to him, a way of protecting himself from the cruel world, the world where he never belonged to, the world who said he was a mistake.

_‘You’re weak’_

_‘You’re nothing but a burden’_

**_‘You’re worthless, useless’_ **

His body shook violently at those words. Why won’t they just leave him alone? Why do they have to torture him like this, as if his life alone was not miserable enough. He buried his head deeper in his tiny hands, tiny sobs leaving his trembling lips. He laid down at the back of the room, hiding himself in the farthest corner out of sight.

He was 7 when those words were first uttered to him. His father blamed his mother’s death on him as she died giving birth to him. He knew nothing, yet the old man mercilessly abused him, spitting out curse words, hitting him with anything, everything. He was a small boy only seeking for his father’s love. At the age of 7, he learnt that love was unconditional. He still loved his abusive father.

At the age of 10, his father started coming home very late and very drunk. He learned to take care of himself, to cook meals for both him and his abusive father. He still loved the man unconditionally, he was all the young boy had left. The old man would abuse him, throw him around breaking him. He was 10 when he said, “I’m the cause of all this. I am to blame. I deserve this.” something an innocent, growing boy should never even think of.

Being a misfit in school, he was always alone. The kids made fun of him because of his bruises and because he was easily scared, he never minded. “This is what I get for destroying my father’s happiness. This is my punishment”, the young boy said, repeating it daily like a sacred mantra. He was bullied, verbally and physically. At the age of 13, he was traumatised, scarred by the world. The world was too much for the young boy who only asked for love. ‘ ** _Maybe I do not deserve love._** ’ his little heart said.

On his mother’s death anniversary, the boy would spend the day at the altar. Bowing deeply that his knees bruised, his chapped lips trembling, eyes red filled with tears, voicing out silent apologies. The picture of the smiling woman whom he never met, he wonders if he will receive the love he was seeking for from the warm smile displayed in the picture. ‘ _But I took away my father’s happiness. **I do not deserve love.**_ **’**

_‘You know you don’t deserve anything. **You’re a mistake.** ’_

Those alluring voices, dangerous yet intriguing. He was scared of those voices, he was curious where they came from, his fragile heart wounded, cracking, slowly shattering without him noticing because of those voices. ‘ _We’re all you have. Listen to us._ ’ Being 14 and naive, he listened to those damaging voices, giving in to their dark desires, slowly destroying himself.

He still remembers the day he woke up with unbearable pain, his lower abdomen bleeding. His father came home drunk and was enraged. He was in his room sleeping when his father slammed his door open and abused him. He was prepared for his usual beating but never did the young boy expect his father would do such an unimaginable thing to him, to a young boy like him, _his own son_.

He screamed, he cried, he begged for his father’s mercy. The man continued assaulting him, satisfying his needs, releasing his rage. The boy fought the man hovering over him, hitting him, scratching him, in hopes the man above him would stop. With every thrust of his father’s hips, bits of his consciousness was knocked out of him. His attempts to fight back failed and soon, the boy saw black, tears escaping from his eyes down his chubby cheeks. ‘ _How could his own father do this to him_ ’ his little heart cried. At the age of 14, he accepted his fate as his father’s outlet to release all his rage, his frustrations, his desires.

_‘You’re tainted’_

_‘ **No one will love you now’**_

“Nam Woohyun, you little shit!” his father cursed at him, hands raised ready to land punches to his already fragile body. He whimpered as his father continued with his blows, allowing his father to let all his rage out. The kicks, the punches, the curses, the assaults, he’s now used to it. He walked out of his house after the beating to get medicines and bandages to clean himself and something to help his father’s hangover in the morning. Despite all his father did to him, he can’t bring his pure heart to hate the man. He is now 17 and is already immune to the punches and assaults. Curse words were nothing to him now, he’s grown used to it.

He received disgusted looks from his neighbours as he walked to the store. “You have to report him, Woohyun. You can’t let him continue doing this to you”, the cashier looked at the beat up boy, still in his school uniform, covered in blood and skin already bruising. The cashier was the only one kind enough to talk to the boy, he was his neighbour after all. The boy only managed a weak smile to the cashier and walked out of the store. His heart clenched, ‘ _He’s all I have left. I should accept the consequences of what I did_ ’. After all the abuse and assault, he still loves his father.

It was already dark when he walked out of the store. He took his sweet time, he doesn’t want to go back to the prison he calls home. ‘ _Just a little while_ ’, his little heart whispered. He was beyond tired, physically and mentally. He strolled around the park and sat on the swing set. He pushed himself forward and backwards, making the swing move. As the movement quickens, tears start to well up in his eyes.

The swing stopped moving as he cried, sobbing silently. His blood from the cuts were dried, his body ached but not as bad as how his heart was hurting. He clutched his chest, sobbing silently into the night. The voices came and poisoned his mind, suggesting destructive thoughts to the already fragile boy. ‘ _No one cares even if you scream your tiny heart out. **You are nobody to this world**._ ’ The voices triggered something in the boy’s head, something dangerous and very destructive.

He took out the pocket knife he bought to cut his bandages and aligned it at his wrist. ‘ _Just do it. You’ll never suffer again. No more abuse, no more assaults. **You’ll be at peace. You’ll be free.**_ ’ the voice rang in his head. He took a deep breath and ran the knife along his wrist, blood seeping through his pale bruised skin. He felt satisfied seeing the blood dripping from his wrist, staining the once brown dirt crimson red.

He went in again and slashed his arm open again and again. His arm now littered with cuts, red painting his once pale skin. Once he was satisfied, he dropped the knife, feeling light headed and satisfied. He looked up at the sky, the moon shining brightly above his head, feeling drowsy due to the deep cuts. He felt himself slowly drifting into darkness before a pair of strong arms caught him from falling to the ground.

‘ _Finally, I can go._ ’ his little heart sighed in relief.

He woke up to the sound of machines beeping and white walls. His eyes adjusted to the light, scanning the room. As he was in his own world trying to figure out how he got there, how he got to the hospital, a voice greeted him. “Oh, you’re awake.” the foreign voice said. Panic surged through the boy, his immediate instinct was to cover his head, pulled his knees close to him to protect himself. After years of abuse and assault, it was a habit of his, to hide himself, protect himself from hits and curses.

Seeing the boy panic, fear displayed clearly in his eyes, the stranger apologised. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m sorry.” the stranger said again, with an apologetic smile on his face. Woohyun looked down at his hands, all bandaged and his cuts were cleaned. “You were out for a couple of days. We tried to contact your family but no one picked up the call,” he continued again. Upon hearing the word family, the young boy panicked again.

What was he to tell his father? Does his father even noticed him missing? What has his father been eating? Who’s nursing his hangover? He worried for the old man more than his own well being. He imagined all the beatings he’ll get once he’s home. The boy started to shake violently, sobbing loudly. Instinctively, the stranger went to the boy and tried to calm the crying boy. When he tried to hug the boy, the boy pushed him away, eyes filled with fear. “D-Don’t hurt me, p-please.” the boy cried out, voice hoarse. The stranger rang for the nurses and put the boy to sleep.

He woke up again, realising that he was still in the same room as before. He saw the stranger sitting on the chair beside him, dressed in a white coat, immersed in a book. The doctor looked up from his book and the boy panicked again. “It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.” the doctor said in a calming manner. The boy’s breathing was still erratic. “Hey, hey. Calm down. It’s not healthy for you to continue on like this. Take deep breaths. I’m not going to hurt you, I promise.” the doctor said inching closer to the boy, hands raised as a sign he won’t do anything to hurt him.

The doctor starts taking deep breaths and Woohyun followed, his breathing becoming less erratic. “There you go. Deep breaths.” the doctor repeated again. The doctor observed the boy slowly calming down, ‘Why did no one do anything to help this poor boy?’ the doctor thought to himself. It was obvious the boy was abused based on the bruises on the boy’s face and body. “You doing good, Woohyun? I’m Dongwoo. Do you remember anything before you passed out?” the doctor asked the boy.

Woohyun tensed when the doctor said his name but soon loosen up to the thought that he was in a hospital and the doctor would never hurt him. He shook his head to answer the doctor’s question, he tried recalling the night and remembered someone catching him before he passed out. The boy opened his mouth to say something but remained silent. He looked down at his hands, playing with the loose thread of his blanket. “A boy brought you in. He’s been waiting outside for days, for you to wake up. I’ll call him in, is that okay?” The doctor said calmly to not cause another panic attack to the boy.

_‘Who would save you? **You’re not worth saving.’**_

When the doctor left, Woohyun tried his best to not panic and tried to distract himself. He took deep calming breaths like he did earlier with the doctor. He doesn’t want to pass out again, he needed to thank the person who was kind enough to help him, to help someone so worthless, unimportant like him. He cleared his head and found the newspaper sitting on the table beside his bed and grabbed it. He flipped through the newspaper until one particular article caught his attention.

 **“Man found dead, overdosed”** the caption read.

His fingers trembled when he saw his father’s picture in that article. He read through the article, tears flowing freely down his chubby cheeks. ‘ _No no no. This can’t be real_.’ he threw the newspaper away from him and sobbed loudly.

_‘You will never be abused again’_

_‘The old man deserved it’_

_‘ **You’ll be alone forever’**_

The voices came and poisoned his thoughts again. The doctor came in with a familiar figure behind him. Woohyun flinched when he felt a familiar pair of strong arms hugging him close. “He’s dead. Tell me that’s not true.” the boy cried loudly making the doctor confused with the situation. The doctor picked up the newspaper and saw the article the boy was reading, “Is this man related to you Woohyun?” the doctor asked.

Woohyun only cried louder into the familiar arms hugging him. “That’s his father, the only family he had left.” the cashier said. The cashier ran his hands up and down the boy’s back. Soon the crying stopped and the boy fell asleep, too exhausted and still in shock with what’s happened. The cashier tucked the sleeping boy, wiping any traces of tears from his face. ‘ _He doesn’t deserve this, he deserves better_ ’ said the cashier’s little heart.

“He didn’t freak out when he saw you, I assume you both know each other?” the doctor asked making the cashier sigh. “I’m Sunggyu, his neighbour. I bet you found out that he’s been abused when you did a check up on him. It’s been like that ever since he was young. He would sometimes come to my house to take refuge after his father beats him. I told him to report his father to the police but he wouldn’t. He kept on saying he couldn’t, that he deserved those beatings because he took away his father’s happiness.” the cashier sighed, looking at the sleeping boy sadly.

Sunggyu sat next to the sleeping boy and held his hand. “I’ll protect you this time. I’ll take care of you, I promise.” the cashier whispered to the boy.

 

* * *

   
2 years later  
  
Sunggyu opened the door to his house to find it disturbingly quiet. Woohyun would usually be in the living room watching some crappy tv show to avoid the thought that he’s alone in the apartment. Once Woohyun was stable enough to be discharged, Sunggyu brought Woohyun out of the neighbourhood, moved out of town to live in the suburbs. It took Sunggyu some time to convince the younger boy, when he managed to talk some sense into the boy, assuring him, promising him again and again, Woohyun agreed.

The past 2 years was not easy for Sunggyu, it wasn’t easy for both of them. He still remembers the day he found Woohyun crying in the corner of his bedroom, hands littered with cuts, scratches and bruises. Dongwoo did warn him that this will happen more often due to the boy’s trauma, the memory of his father beating him, his abuse, his assaults will continue to haunt him. It took Sunggyu a solid two hours to calm the boy down, whispering soothing and calming words to him.

He was snapped away from his thoughts when he heard noises from the bathroom. He drops his briefcase and keys, immediately running to the bathroom. He opened the door and saw a small figure in the bath tub sitting under the stream of the cold shower water. He quickly turned the shower off and wrapped the trembling boy with a towel. He dried the boy, stripped him off his wet clothes so the boy doesn’t get sick. His eyes were red, tears were visibly flowing down his flushed cheeks.

“It’s all my fault. I’m a burden to everyone. I don’t deserve this. I should be the one buried in the ground instead of my mother. My father would’ve still been alive now if it’s not for me.” Woohyun repeated again and again. Sunggyu inched closer to Woohyun, but with every step Sunggyu take, Woohyun will move away from him.

“D-Don’t. I’m d-disgusting. I-I’m dirty.” Oh how those words crushed Sunggyu.

He reached out and grabbed Woohyun’s hand and tilted the boy’s head up so their eyes meet. “Woohyun, look at me please.” the older boy pleaded. Sunggyu stroked the boy’s chubby cheeks, “It’s not your fault, Woohyun. The things that happened was not your doing. Fate was cruel to you, it wasn’t your fault. Please, the world’s the one who’s supposed to apologise to you for putting you in such situation. Such a precious boy, the words shouldn’t be uttered by you.” he said looking into Woohyun’s hazel eyes, tears still flowing down freely.

_‘He doesn’t mean those words’_

_‘You know he’s only after your ass’_

_‘He’s lying’_

_‘ **Who would love you? The love he’s showing to you is fake** ’_ the demons in his had said mockingly.

**_‘No one would love you’_ **

“Don’t listen to those demons, Woohyun. Look at me. I love you, I really do. Not out of pity of your past but because of your pure heart. I’ll never lie to you.” Sunggyu knew him too well, he knows what the demons in his head are saying. The sincerity in Sunggyu’s eyes was what made the younger boy trust him. He hugged Woohyun close to him, sharing his warmth with Woohyun. It pained Sunggyu that all he could do to help him was being by the younger boy’s side, whispering soothing words to him. He wanted to be able to do more, to show the boy he deserved more. But to be able to do that he’ll need to take things slow, he doesn’t want to scare Woohyun.

Once the sobbing stopped and Woohyun’s breathing was calm, Sunggyu carried Woohyun to the younger’s room and tucked him in and kissed the crown of the boy’s head. “You deserve all the happiness in the world. Remember that.” he whispered into the boy’s hair, hugging Woohyun close to him. He was about to walk out of the younger’s room when Woohyun grabbed his hand. “C-Can you sleep with me tonight?” the younger boy asked looking everywhere except Sunggyu. Sunggyu smiled at Woohyun’s request and nodded. He made his way under the covers next to Woohyun and hugged him close.

Woohyun sighed in relief when he felt Sunggyu’s strong arms around him and nuzzled into the crook of his neck. It was rare for Woohyun to ask for anything let alone make requests like this from the elder. Sunggyu was glad Woohyun was opening up to him. He will always be by the boy’s side, protecting him, taking care of him and loving the boy endlessly. Woohyun deserves the happiness, deserves the love the elder offered to him and Sunggyu will always tell him that until Woohyun believes in his words. Till then, he’ll always be by Woohyun’s side. He does not plan on leaving Woohyun’s side ever.

“I love you, Woohyun. Always remember that.”

 

 


	2. Till then, I'll fight for you

He screams his lungs out, tears escaping his eyes. He broke free of the strong hold and ran. He ran till his legs can no longer run. He looked back and saw no one was after him. His surrounding was dark, not a single glimpse of light.

_‘Silly boy, you can’t run. **Muse us** , try and resist our temptation’_

He crouched clutching his ears shut. “Go away! Go away!” the boy shouted, breath short and uneven. He shook his head, hands still clutching his ears shut in an attempt to make those voices go.

_‘You’re a murderer.’_

_‘You’ll never know true happiness’_

_‘He is your punishment. His love for you is your curse’_

_‘ **He’ll leave you’**_

The voices got the better of the fragile young boy. The words echoing in his head, triggering every fear he’s been enduring. He hugged his knees close to him, sobbing loudly into his knees.

‘ _Woohyunnie_ ’ he flinched at the voice

‘ _Woohyunnie_ ’ the voice, so calm, so soothing

‘ _Woohyunnie_ ’ His voice.

* * *

 

  
He shot his eyes open and felt strong arms around him, hugging him close. “Shh. Calm down. I’ve got you.” the voice, soothing and calming. The voice of his saving grace. The voice of his Sunggyu. He clutched onto the older’s shirt, pulling himself closer to him. He was wetting Sunggyu’s shirt with the tears he shed because of the nightmare, the nightmare that often haunt his sleep. He was no longer sobbing, breath hiccuping after one another. He sniffles and looked up at his boyfriend, eyes glassy, his sharp nose red. Sunggyu wiped Woohyun’s tears off his chubby cheeks, looking into the beautiful brown orbs of his precious angel.

Sunggyu’s eyes radiated only love for the younger boy, he continued to caress Woohyun’s cheeks as the younger boy calms down. Woohyun leaned into the palm caressing his flushed cheeks. It’s always like this when Woohyun has an episode in the middle of the night. The nightmares were not as frequent as it was two years ago when he moved in with Sunggyu. He buried his head in the crook of the elder’s neck taking in Sunggyu’s scent. It always calmed the boy down. Sunggyu smells like strawberries and fresh flowers. It pained Sunggyu seeing the boy crying in the middle of the night, he felt helpless whilst hugging the boy to calm him down.

“I’ll always be here with you” Sunggyu whispered into the younger’s hair, showering the crown of Woohyun’s head with kisses. Two years ago Woohyun would’ve rejected all this, he would’ve ran away from Sunggyu’s calming hold, he would’ve denied all of Sunggyu’s promises. “I’m not worth your love. I’m disgusting, tainted.” He remembers the look on Woohyun’s face, scared, fear in his eyes, he was disgusted with himself. The elder didn’t blame the boy, he didn’t force himself onto the younger boy. He slowly worked on gaining the boy’s trust, showing him that he was sincere, his love was not of sympathy. Sunggyu would do anything for the boy, Woohyun deserves a better life. Woohyun deserves happiness in his life and Sunggyu wanted to be the one giving him that happiness.

“I’m sorry, Gyu.” It broke Sunggyu whenever Woohyun says that. He hugged the younger boy closer to him, he knows Woohyun feels guilty for waking the elder up to go to his room just to calm him, a petty nightmare as the younger says it. “You don’t have to be sorry baby. I wanted to be here for you. Stop apologising.” He definitely didn’t mind it at all, Woohyun’s room was just across the hall. He continues to rub Woohyun’s back assuring him it was okay. “Gyu. you won’t leave me right?” Woohyun said in between sniffles.

He pulls Woohyun away from the hug and lifted the young boy’s handsome face.   
“I wouldn’t even think of it” he placed a kiss on his forehead  
“Not even in a million years” a kiss landed on Woohyun’s cheeks  
“I’ll be here no matter what” he kissed the boy’s sharp nose  
“Forever. That’s my promise to you” he said pressing his forehead to Woohyun’s, rubbing their noses against one another.

Woohyun’s eyes fluttered shut as Sunggyu leaned closer, breaths mingling together. Sunggyu was taken aback when Woohyun closed the final distance between them but gave in to the kiss seconds later. Lips moving against each other innocently, putting all their emotions into it. Fingers laced around there elder’s neck, Woohyun deepens the kiss. Sunggyu could feel the younger blush and smiled in the kiss. Woohyun was never the one to initiate such things and the elder cherished every moment, the faint blush on the younger’s face, making sure to plant it permanently in his memory. Forehead resting against one another as they part from the kiss. Woohyun still had his eyes closed, cheeks flushed, a mesmerising smile across his face.

Sunggyu was glad he was the one who caught the younger at the park. He doesn’t even want to think of what would’ve happened if he ignored his hunch to walk through the park. He was grateful he followed his hearts’ voice or he would have to live with regret his whole life. Sunggyu has always had feelings for the younger ever since they were both small. “I’ll protect Woohyunnie, halmeoni!” he remembers his younger self pledging that to his grandmother before she died of old age.

“Thank you, Gyu” Woohyun whispered against the elder’s lips. “I’m glad you caught me at the park 2 years ago. Thank you for accepting me as I am, any sane person would’ve distanced themselves from me. I know I’m a burden, I know I’m tainted-“ Woohyun’s words were cut off by Sunggyu’s lips, placing a chaste kiss on the younger’s full lips.

“You are no burden to me. I love you with all my heart, you have no idea how happy I am having you with me now. I once considered of kidnapping you out of your own house, Hyun. I’ve been wanting to break you out of that place, give you all the love you deserve ever since you started coming to halmeoni for refuge. Don’t ever think I am in any way disgusted by you, Hyunnie” his eyes were fixed on the younger’s brown eyes that he admired so dearly. He stroked the younger’s cheeks, eyes filled with love, “Woohyun, I love you. Let me take care of you, stop thinking of yourself as a burden.” Sunggyu kissed the younger’s nose and soon enough they both drifted to sleep, hugging each other close.

Woohyun woke up in Sunggyu’s embrace that morning. He felt safe, loved, he felt at home in Sunggyu’s embrace. He nuzzled into the elder’s chest taking in Sunggyu’s scent.

_‘This will never last’_

_‘He’ll grow tired of you’_

_‘ **His love for you will fade** ’_

He shivered at those words, snuggling closer into Sunggyu in an attempt to shut the voices out. His breathing turned rapid at the voices in his head grew louder but soon became calmer when he felt the elder’s arm around his waist. “Good morning, beautiful”, Sunggyu’s raspy morning voice greeted him. Woohyun enjoys mornings like this especially on weekends because it was Sunggyu’s day off from work. Sunggyu managed to get a job in a company with the help of his friend.

He snuggled closer to Sunggyu, enjoying his presence, his scent, his everything. “Clingy now are we?” the elder kissed the crown of his lover’s head. Woohyun only snuggled closer to the elder, hugging Sunggyu so their bodies were flushed against one another. Sunggyu smiled at the younger’s actions. He knows the thoughts were bothering him and he learnt at those moments Woohyun just needs to know he was close by, that he wasn’t alone.

They cuddled under the covers, enjoying each other’s calming breaths and warmth. “What do you want to do today, Woohyunnie?” the elder asked breaking the comfortable silence between them. “We can just stay in, watch a movie and laze around if you want. We don’t have to go out.”, he added seeing the younger pondering, staring into space with a frown on his face. In all honesty, Woohyun wants to go out that day, he wants to enjoy the sun and the clear sky. But whenever he is out, he gets anxious and fidgety.

_‘Great. You’ve disappointed him’_

_‘Yes, let the others see how disgusting you are’_

_‘Go and embarrass yourself’_

_‘ **Go out, let the world crush on your happy little life that you never deserved** ’_

“Woohyunnie” the elder nudged his nose at the side of his face, noticing the troubled expression on his love’s beautiful face. Woohyun muttered a low sorry and sat, hands ruffling through his fluffy hair. “Don’t force yourself, love. Anything you decide on doing today, I’ll be happy to go with it.” Sunggyu sat next to the younger, pulling him in the space between his legs, pressing his broad chest on the younger’s back. He rests his head on the younger’s shoulder, placing butterfly kisses on the side of Woohyun’s neck.

“I.. I want to go out today.” Woohyun said lowly but loud enough for the elder to hear him. Woohyun played with his fingers, head hung low focused on his hands. “M-maybe to the park or the beach” the young boy said shyly, a faint blush painting his pale cheeks. Living in the suburbs has it’s perks, the parks were not as crowded as back when they were in the city and now they are closer to the beach. Sunggyu made sure before they moved he’d find a place close to the beach, he knows how much Woohyun loves the beach.

“Picnic at the beach it is then!” Sunggyu exclaimed cheerfully, making the younger smile. “I think there’ll be a carnival going on at the beach too today. We can go and check it out. Would you like that?” hearing that, the inner child in Woohyun was excited, he was giddy all over. Seeing the sparkle in his love’s eyes made Sunggyu happy. The elder knows how much Woohyun loves going to carnivals, it was his way to let loose, to forget everything even if it only lasted for a short while.

_“Gyuuuu” 9-years-old Woohyun whined. They were both lying under the stars, Woohyun’s father was out late and Sunggyu’s grandmother offered him to stay the night knowing the boy would be beaten to a pulp once his father comes home. 11-years-old Sunggyu only hummed to his friend. The young boy continued to poke the elder’s chubby cheeks, seeking for his attention. “Let’s ask halmeoni if we can go to the carnival tomorrow. Pleeaaaassseeeee” Woohyun said, eyes pleading. He knew Sunggyu could never say no to his puppy eyes. The elder sighed and asks his grandmother once they both came inside. The old lady, just like his grandson, could never resist Woohyun’s pleading eyes and agreed to bring them to the carnival tomorrow._

_Woohyun’s eyes lit up when they reached the carnival, his little heart beating furiously, too excited, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He dragged Sunggyu on every ride they both can ride, from the carousel to the ferris wheel. Woohyun was happy, Sunggyu for once could not see traces of any sadness on the younger’s face. That was the day he promised to always make the younger boy smile and to always protect him._

They both got up from bed, washed themselves and prepared their lunch for the picnic together. Woohyun does most of the cooking as he was used to preparing his own meals since he was young. The elder insisted that he help Woohyun which ended with Sunggyu snacking on almost everything Woohyun cooked and the younger nagging at his boyfriend. “If you keep on eating those sandwiches, there would be nothing left for us for the picnic Gyu.” Woohyun nagged while cutting the vegetables for the kimbap. The elder chuckled at his love’s cuteness. Woohyun would always scrunch his nose whenever he is angry.

Sunggyu hugged Woohyun, still laughing at the younger’s cuteness and moved to wash the dishes. Woohyun smiled at Sunggyu’s actions, he knows everything about Woohyun, even the smallest of details. He sneaked a glance at Sunggyu, the elder was softly humming to a random song, a habit the elder has when doing something.

‘ _This will not last and you know it. Don’t you ever dare think that he’ll stay with you forever._ ’ The demonic voices rang in his head.

Woohyun shook his head in an attempt to dismiss those destructive voices. Sunggyu promised him and he knows Sunggyu would never break his promise. He doesn’t want to let such things to ruin his mood.

‘ _Silly boy, you don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve to be happy_ ’ the voice mocked him.

He ignored what the voice had said. He winced suddenly and only noticed that he had accidentally cut himself.

_‘You’re useless’_

_‘How can anyone even mess up an easy task’_

_‘How pathetic’_

_‘ **He’ll leave** once he knows you’re beyond fixable’_

He crouched on the floor, blood dripping from his cut. “I can’t even do things properly! Why do I have to be so useless!” Woohyun shouted, his small frame shaking violently. The elder hugged him close, Woohyun was always vulnerable especially after those nightmares. He took the younger’s uninjured hand and placed it over his heart.

“Woohyun, ignore whatever those voices are saying. Focus on the beat of my heart. It’s beating for you, rooting for you, making sure I keep going to hold you close to me, wake up next to you in my arms. Ignore them, baby. Listen only to my heartbeat, listen to it’s promise to keep beating for you.” Sunggyu whispered against Woohyun’s ears. He looked into the elder’s eyes, seeking for any lies, any uncertainty but Woohyun only saw sincerity and love in the brown orbs of his love. “I love you, Hyunnie. With all my heart, all my breath, all my being.” Sunggyu placed a kiss on Woohyun’s cheeks, eyes lingering on the other.

Before Woohyun could mutter his apology, the elder brought him up on his feet and cleaned his cut, wrapped a band-aid on it and kissed his injured finger. “There, all clean and wrapped up! Let’s pack things up in the basket and we’ll be set for the picnic. Okay, love?” the elder chirped happily. Sunggyu’s energy was radioting pure happiness and Woohyun can’t help but smile along with him.

They both got out of the apartment some time later and set off for the beach. By the time they reached the beach, it was already 1 in the afternoon. Sunggyu laid out their picnic mat under a shady spot they found and laid out their prepared food. Woohyun’s eyes wandered around the beach, there weren’t many people maybe because of the time of the day they chose to go to the beach. He saw the carnival being set up not too far from where they were sitting, he saw a ferris wheel and a smile graced his handsome face. The younger turned to look at the elder and caught the latter staring at him, smile mirroring each other’s feelings.

“Thank you, Sunggyu.” the young boy said and the elder knows he meant it, for everything he’s done for him. They sat next to each other facing the vast ocean in front of them and enjoyed their little picnic, exchanging jokes only they both understand. When they finished everything it was already 4 in the evening, they packed everything up, ensuring they threw away all the rubbish they had in the bin. They walked back to their car and kept the picnic basket in the back seat and walked back to the beach,

They strolled along the beach, shy waves kissing their bare feet, hands laced together perfectly. Woohyun breathed in the scent of the beach, breeze hitting his face lightly, sun kissing his pale skin. Woohyun was at peace and Sunggyu was beyond ecstatic even if the younger would be at peace for a short while. To be able to make his love happy was enough for Sunggyu. Sunggyu couldn’t resist the urge to kiss the younger’s cheeks, making Woohyun giggle at Sunggyu’s sudden action. They continued walking down the beach to where the carnival was.

Woohyun’s eyes lit up as soon as they walked into the carnival and pulled Sunggyu towards the rows of booths filled with games. Woohyun won Sunggyu a soft plushie at the shooting game. The younger laughed at the elder as he pointed out that the fox plushie looked Sunggyu. The elder protested and whined but soon gave in to what the younger said because in all honesty, Sunggyu loves whenever this side of Woohyun, the real Woohyun surfaced. Eyes shining brightly, a wide smile decorating his face, Woohyun’s melodic laugh, no trace of sadness in his eyes. The elder’s heart melts completely at the sight of Woohyun smiling, like any other kids his age, without worries and confusion weighing them down.

They went around playing and enjoying themselves at the carnival. The lovers let themselves loose that day, setting their young soul free from responsibilities and feelings. As the day comes to an end, allowing night to take over, Sunggyu brought Woohyun over to where the queue for the ferris wheel starts. Thankfully the queue was not long and they got on in a blink of an eye. As they ascend, the sun starts to descend, painting the sky a beautiful orange and purple. Woohyun thought the sunset itself was beautiful but looking to his side where his love was sitting, he was totally mesmerised.

Sunggyu’s skin glowing, hair shining brightly reflecting the departing sun. Before he even realised it, his hand was stroking the elder’s cheeks lovingly. Woohyun was eternally grateful for Sunggyu, for his angel. To him, Sunggyu was his everything. To him, Sunggyu was his breath and he’d do anything to fight for that breath making sure one day he can give back as much as what the elder has given to him. Sunggyu smiled and leaned into the hand caressing his cheeks making Woohyun’s heart beat furiously. At that moment, his heart struck him, he really loves the elder.

_‘The thing you feared most will happen soon’_

_‘This will not last, it never were meant to be’_

_‘He will walk away like everyone else did in your life’_

_‘He will break you’_

His mouth itched to utter the words but was unsure because of his thoughts. He took a deep breath and looked directly into Sunggyu’s eyes, putting aside all of his doubts.

“I love you, Sunggyu.” Woohyun felt his heart was about to jump out, for once he knew how deep the meaning to those words were. At that moment, Sunggyu made Woohyun want to continue fighting for him and he was more than sure he wants a future with the elder. Sunggyu’s smile brightened up the younger’s world. Sunggyu moved in closer and closed the gap between them. They kissed, innocent and pure. Emotions all were conveyed, all that Woohyun was not able to voice out, all that Sunggyu has to offer, they poured it all out witnessed by the setting sun.

They parted, shy smiles decorating their faces as if that was their very first kiss. Their breaths mixing with one another’s, Sunggyu thought it was impossible for him to fall deeper for the younger but dear god was he wrong. Every moment they shared together were sacred to them, it was their moment, let it be the good or the bad. They both have the same thoughts running through their head but neither of them knew. Time will do it’s work making their love story better than any others despite the challenges they’ll have to go through.

He leaned his head on the elder’s chest, ears right above his love’s beating heart, face facing the sunset in front of them. Woohyun knew he was far from perfect, he was still seeking and fixing himself for the better. But for now, he’ll give his everything to Sunggyu, he’ll give what his incomplete, imperfect self has to offer. Till then, he’ll fight the voices for his love, for Sunggyu.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well here it is! It took longer than I expected tho. I hope you enjoyed reading it!


	3. Till then, forever with you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the final chapter is up! Thank you for waiting so patiently for the final chapter. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this for all of you.

“You know what, I’m done.”

 

Words that Woohyun feared the most were uttered by his love. ‘ _No, no. It can’t be. I must’ve heard it wrong_.’ Woohyun looked at the elder’s face, searching for any uncertainty but he was only greeted by a cold expression. “W-what?” he said, confused.

 

“Come on, Woohyun. You’re not dense, you know exactly what I meant.” Sunggyu glared, obviously annoyed by the younger. “I’m done, I’m tired. You’re too much for me to handle. I knew I should’ve just left you at the hospital, like everybody else in your life did.” Woohyun wasn’t expecting this, not even one bit.

 

‘ _He regrets saving me. He regretted that he waited for me._ ’ Woohyun was too deep in his head, still grasping on the situation, on what’s just happened. He felt warm tears stream down his chubby cheeks, dripping on his hand. He heard noises from their shared bedroom and saw Sunggyu walk out of their bedroom with his belongings packed in a luggage.

 

“You’re beyond fixable. I should’ve realised it sooner. You can’t be loved, Woohyun. I’m tired of trying.”panic displayed on his face, tears wetting his full cheeks. He watched as the elder walked towards the door of their apartment. ‘ _He’s leaving. He really is leaving._ ’ Woohyun wanted to cry out, shout Sunggyu’s name, beg for him to stay but his voice betrayed him.

 

‘ _Don’t leave_ ’ Woohyun tried to shout, his voice swallowed by his surrounding. His love kept on walking further away from him, nearer to the door. His body went stiff, ‘ _no, no! He can’t._ ’ his mind screamed but his body won’t move. He wants to run to the elder, stop the elder from leaving.

 

“I never loved you.” At those words, Sunggyu walked out of the apartment leaving Woohyun a sobbing mess on the floor in the middle of their apartment.

 

‘ _Come back, don’t leave me_.’ his heart whimpered, silent sobs escaping his lips. The words his beloved said was echoing in his head.

 

‘ ** _We’ve been telling you, he doesn’t love you. He never did._** ’ the voices in his head mocked him. Woohyun hugged his knees close to him, clutched his ears shut trying to stop the mocking voices.

 

‘ ** _You’ll always be alone_** ’

 

‘ ** _You’re not worth anyone’s love_** ’

 

‘ ** _Remember who you are, what you are_** ’

 

‘ ** _You are tainted, disgusting, unfit to be loved_** ’

 

Woohyun tried his best to fight the voices, the demons in him. He stayed curled on the floor, drowned in his tears, in his sadness. When Sunggyu left, he felt like a huge part of him was snatched away from him.

 

‘ ** _He’ll never come back_** ’

 

‘ ** _He never loved you_** ’

 

“Stop! Stop!” Woohyun shouted his heart out. But it went on, images of Sunggyu with another lover, happy and smiling were flashing in his mind. Woohyun cried his heart out, nursing his broken heart.

 

 

He shot his eyes open and panicked when Sunggyu was not in bed next to him. It was 3 in the morning, the dream kept on replaying in his head. It all seemed so vivid to the young boy.

 

‘ ** _He’ll leave_** ’

 

‘ ** _He’ll walk away_** ’

 

‘ ** _You’ll find yourself alone when you wake up_** ’

 

Those words being repeated in his head, the voices mocked him, laughing at his misery. He sobbed loudly, muttering silent apologies to the elder.

 

Sunggyu rushed to his room when he heard Woohyun’s cries. “Shh baby. I’m here.” he hugged the crying boy close to him. “I’m sorry, I’m here. I’m here, Woohyunnie” the elder rocked them both, kissing the boy’s hair, spreading kisses all over Woohyun’s face.

 

“Y-you l-left m-me” Woohyun repeated in between sobs. The warmth surrounding him seemed too real. The kisses, his voice, it all seemed too real, just like in the dream.

 

“You d-don’t.. don’t l-love me” Sunggyu’s heart shattered.

 

“You hate m-me. I’m dirty.” his lips trembling, nose red.

 

After 3 years with Sunggyu, Woohyun still finds it hard to ignore the voices in his head. They’ve been with him since he was young. The voices were still there, very much loud and very clear in his head, only that with time he learnt to silence them. He doesn’t have nightmares as often but once they happen, it’ll definitely cause a great panic to the elder. The nightmares have shifted from being a memory of his father abusing him to a possible future whereby his love left him, unloved.

 

He continued to hug the trembling boy close to him. He knew how the younger’s feelings were fragile, how a single nightmare can affect him hard. Sunggyu tried everything he can to protect the younger, to protect his little love. About a year ago, Woohyun’s nightmares shifted from him being abused to Sunggyu leaving him. The elder always assures Woohyun that the nightmare will never ever happen, not when he was totally head over heels for the younger.

 

“I’d be crazy to leave you, Hyun. You have no idea how whipped I am for you.” Sunggyu said, levelling his face to Woohyun’s, taking in his flushed face in his palms. He rested their foreheads together, kissing away stray tears on Woohyun’s face. “I can never imagine my life without you in it. Heck, I don’t even want to imagine it, ever. It’s too painful and dull.” the elder said, stroking the cheeks of his love, loving the fulness of his chubby cheeks in his palms.

 

‘ ** _He’s saying that so you stop crying your sorry ass off_** ’

 

‘ ** _He’s saying those so you stop bothering him_** ’

 

‘ ** _He doesn’t mean those words, never does_** ’

 

Woohyun clenched his eyes shut, leaning into the warm palms of the elder. The more comfortable he gets to Sunggyu, the louder the voices get. He wants to ignore them, he really does but his insecurities, his past kept on haunting him, he can’t help but feel paranoid.

 

“Baby” Sunggyu’s voice sounded so calm, so soothing. He’s scared to open his eyes, scared if that was all a dream, scared that when he opens his eyes, all of it will fade away.

 

“Hyunnie” Seeing how his love won’t look at him, he leaned down to kiss Woohyun, a soft peck on the younger’s lips. “You know what the voices said aren’t true. I meant everything I said, love.” Woohyun opened his eyes and saw his love so close to him, looking at him with eyes filled with love and care. He felt guilty for giving in to the voices, he knew Sunggyu would never leave him, he would never stop loving him.

 

“I’m sorry” he muttered, head hung low. Sunggyu hated whenever Woohyun apologised like that. He had nothing to apologise for but no matter how much he told his love, he will just keep apologising. “It’s okay, Hyunnie. There’s nothing for you to be sorry about” he said kissing the younger’s nose. He smiled as Woohyun scrunched his little nose.

 

They continued staying in each other’s arms, Woohyun’s head lying comfortably on Sunggyu’s built chest, the elder’s calm heartbeat keeping him grounded. He loves this man, he truly does. He just wished he could resist all the crazy things the voices in his head say. Woohyun’s been trying to block them out, focusing only on Sunggyu but things were not as easy as it seems.

 

With the calm heartbeat of his love and Sunggyu’s hand playing with his hair, sleep slowly took over Woohyun. Seeing his love’s calm sleeping face made Sunggyu’s heart skip a beat. He’s glad he’s the one who can keep the younger calm but he’s also sad that he was the one who kept giving the younger nightmares. He was deep in thoughts when he dozed off joining Woohyun in his slumber.

 

Woohyun woke up later in the morning, surrounded by his love’s warmth. ‘It’s today’ he whispered to himself with a small smile plastered on his face. He slowly got out of bed not wanting to wake Sunggyu up from his sleep and walked to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for both of them. Today was a special day for both of them, a day they both were grateful for.

 

He hummed to some random tune that popped up in his head while flipping the pancakes in the pan, smiling to himself as he recalls a fond memory.

 

_Woohyun has always been a better cook than Sunggyu, given that he practically had to look after himself for almost all his life. Woohyun was in the kitchen, in his own little world, frying eggs to eat with their sausages and bacon. He didn’t even notice when his love sneaked up on him, startling him. Woohyun nagged at the elder for startling him, complaining how it was not good for his health, how dangerous it was since they were in the kitchen and Sunggyu just laughed. Woohyun pouted and boy did Sunggyu try hard to resist the younger’s pouty lips. “I’m sorry, babe. I did call out for you but you didn’t notice me”, he said in between his laughter, gathering Woohyun in his arm._

 

_Woohyun can’t help but to melt into Sunggyu’s embrace. “I love you” the elder whispered in his ears causing him to blush. He still needs to get used to hearing those words from the elder, those words that warmed his insides leaving his face flushed. He avoided Sunggyu’s eyes, still very shy towards those words, a small smile plastered on his face. They were so caught in their little world that they forgot the eggs in the pan and were left with only bacon and sausages for breakfast. Woohyun had a mini rant because of his burnt eggs and when he looked up he was met with Sunggyu eating half of the bacons he cooked. “Yah! Kim Sunggyu!” Woohyun yelled from the kitchen as Sunggyu laughed and ran to the living room._

 

He shook his head, a small smile forming on his face. Kim Sunggyu was definitely something else, his cheekiness despite his maturity, how he was stern yet gentle, his patience and his understanding. Indeed, Kim Sunggyu was different. He was all the young boy had, the one who taught him how to love, the one who taught him it’s okay to cry, the one who saved him, he was his everything.

 

A pair of strong arms wrapped around his slim waist. Sunggyu rested his head on Woohyun’s shoulder, placing a soft kiss on the boy’s cheeks. “Good morning”, Sunggyu said groggily, voice deep and raspy. Woohyun muttered a low ‘good morning’, concentrating on his pancakes so they won’t end up burnt because with Kim Sunggyu around in the kitchen, the food tend to get burnt real quick.

 

Sunggyu kept nudging Woohyun’s side trying to get his love’s attention but to no avail. “Stop distracting me, Gyu. Why don’t you be a help for once and set the table for me?” Woohyun said, eyes never leaving the pan. Sunggyu gave his little love a long look- Woohyun didn’t just diss him, right? Woohyun laughed, eyes twinkling so bright that whatever Sunggyu had in his mind to rebut his love’s statement was long forgotten.

 

Sunggyu quietly sets the table, arranging the plates and cutleries like Woohyun usually did because he knows the younger will nag if it’s arranged differently.

 

_“No, Gyugyu you’re doing it wrong! The fork should be on the right side not on the left.” Woohyun whined and rearranged it to how he usually does it. He puffed his cheeks out of frustration, Sunggyu can’t help but chuckle at his love’s antics. He wrapped his strong arms around Woohyun and immediately the young boy melted. “You know, you can’t always get away by hugging me.” Woohyun said in protest._

 

_He chuckled heartily and kissed Woohyun’s forehead, “You know, sometimes your actions betray your words, love.” Sunggyu said with Woohyun still in his arms. Well, there’s some truth in Sunggyu’s words. “When you have a handsome, loving boyfriend you can’t really stay mad at him now can you?” Woohyun said, trying to wriggle free from the elder’s hold._

 

Woohyun walked to the dining table and placed their breakfast on the table. They both ate silently, enjoying each others’ presence. “Woohyunnie, it’s our anniversary today. What do you want to do?” Sunggyu said breaking their comfortable silence. Woohyun just smiled, he had baked Sunggyu some strawberry muffins yesterday while Sunggyu was at work. It was a miracle that Sunggyu didn’t see it whilst opening the refrigerator. He plans to give them as soon as the elder woke up but since he didn’t notice the elder waking up he has to change his plans.

 

“I’m not sure. What do you want to do?” Woohyun said, shrugging his shoulders. “Let’s go to the park in the evening. It’s been a while since we went for an evening walk.” the elder suggests and Woohyun agreed. ‘I’ll just surprise him when we get back from the park. He always wants sweet things after walks.’ the young boy thought to himself.

 

That evening, Sunggyu drove them both to their favourite park, about 15 minutes from their apartment. Sunggyu parked the car and they both walked to the park, hands linked with each other. They walked leisurely side by side, enjoying the evening breeze and the fresh scent of summer. Sunggyu spotted a ice cream cart and went to buy them both an ice cream cone.

 

When Sunggyu walked back to where his love was, he was not amused to see a guy trying to flirt with Woohyun. He saw how Woohyun was uncomfortable with the situation and quickly sat beside Woohyun, maybe a little too close, and that did the trick. The guy walked away and Woohyun released a relieved sigh. “I left you for a couple of minutes and a random dude hits on you,” Sunggyu joked and passed Woohyun the ice cream.

 

He stared at the ice cream, watch it melt and drip. His mind was out wandering, ‘only if that guy knew how dirty I was, he wouldn’t even come close’ he thought to himself.

 

**_‘Anyone in their right mind would steer away from you’_ **

 

**_‘No one wants you’_ **

 

**_‘Once they’ve got what they desired they’ll walk away. Sunggyu will walk away once he got his hands all over you’_ **

 

**_‘You’re already dirty and tainted, it’ll be easier for them’_ **

 

“Hey, baby? Did I say something wrong?” the elder rubbed Woohyun’s back, bringing him back to reality. Woohyun just smiled and shook his head. Sunggyu sensed something was off with his little love and asked Woohyun to trust him and tell him what was bothering him. The younger gave in and told the elder, he made a promise anyway to tell the elder what he was thinking when he spaced out.

 

Sunggyu cupped Woohyun’s face, making sure they were facing each other, eyes locked together. “Hyunnie, those are not true and you know that. I’m still here aren’t I? I love you, every single bit of you. If I didn’t I would’ve left you long ago. God, only if you know how much you mean to me, how much I love you. For God’s sake, you managed to make my lazy ass to make the bed every morning just so I can kiss you.” Sunggyu confessed. Woohyun blushed a bright red at his confession, how intimate that moment was. Sunggyu’s stare was so intense, Woohyun was drawn deep inside those brown orbs.

 

Woohyun muttered a low thank you to Sunggyu and they continued to walk. They spotted a lake with a lot of paddle boats surrounding it. “I wanna ride that, Gyugyu.” Woohyun said, eyes fixed on the boats. They walked towards the lake and hopped on a paddle boat shaped like a swan and paddled to the middle of the lake. The atmosphere surrounding them was very romantic, with the soft breeze of wind hitting their faces. It was just them and another boat on the other side of the lake.

 

Woohyun was enjoying himself, soft rays of the sun shining on his pale face, the wind hitting his face, running through his soft hair. Sunggyu was again mesmerised by the beauty of Woohyun, only if Woohyun knew how beautiful he was, how perfect her was. He smiled seeing his little love blush knowing Sunggyu was looking at him lovingly. Sunggyu kissed Woohyun’s nose and he can’t help but feel at awe when Woohyun scrunched his nose. Woohyun was utterly adorable, Sunggyu could’t get enough of Woohyun.

 

They paddled around the lake, stopping occasionally when the jokes were too funny and they needed to catch their breaths. They continued on until their time on the paddle boat was up. They got out of the boat and continued to walk through the park and settled down on a bench surrounded with beautiful flowers.

 

“Did you have a nice day Woohyun?” Sunggyu asked, curious eyes linger on Woohyun’s face to see his reaction. Woohyun smiled brightly till his eyes disappeared. That alone was enough to tell the elder how much he enjoyed the evening. They talked and talked until the sun was about to set and decided it was already time to call it a day. They’ve decided to stop by the pizza shop to buy dinner and eat it while watching a movie.

 

As they got up, Woohyun realised his shoelace were loose and wanted to tie it back. Before he managed to squat down and tie his shoelaces, Sunggyu was already squatting down and were tying his shoelaces for him. When Sunggyu was done, he did not stand up and Woohyun was puzzled. “Gyu, are you okay? Are your legs hurting? Is it cramped?” Woohyun asked worriedly. Seeing he didn’t receive and reply from the elder, he wanted to ask if he needed help standing up.

 

But what happened next shocked Woohyun. He never saw it coming, never did he ever thought that it could happen to him. There Sunggyu was, kneeling on one knee with a box in his hand. “G-Gyu.. Wha-what?” Woohyun asked, still shocked with Sunggyu’s actions.

 

“Nam Woohyun, ever since we were small I knew you were special. You are so beautiful, perfect in every way. I can’t imagine how I would live if I hadn’t known you. You are so strong that I aspire to be as strong as you. I am very glad you didn’t push me away from trying to help you, I am very glad I caught you in that park. The first day you came crying to halmeoni when we were young, I still remember how you looked. No one should look so breath-taking while crying, but there you were looking so beautiful. My love, today marks our third year together and I plan to spend my eternity together with you. So, Nam Woohyun, will you marry me?”

 

Tears flowed down Woohyun’s cheeks, dripped onto his thighs. Without any single doubt in his heart, he said yes to his love whilst nodding vigorously. “Even a million years, I’ll say yes to spending my eternity with you.” Woohyun sobbed out, in between his inhales. Sunggyu kissed him, soft yet passionate, both with tears streaming down their faces. Their pure love, their beautiful bond was again witnessed by the setting sun.

 

“I love you, Sunggyu. With all my heart, I can’t even express how happy I am right now. Thank you, love.” he said, head resting on Sunggyu’s broad shoulders. “Let’s love each other as long as we live because I can only see my forever with you.” Sunggyu muttered out, loud enough for just Woohyun to hear. They walked back to their car, hands linked together and a new promise bound them together matching each others’ on their ring finger.


	4. Forever with you, only you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Happy 7th anniversary inspirits! Here's a little bonus chapter for you all, a little gift from me to inspirits~ I hope you enjoy this little gift (also this chapter is not edited so forgive me for anything mistakes made) Enjoy!!

Woohyun nervously stood in his room, playing with the hem of his suit, head spinning, his thoughts all over the place. “Hey, calm down. You don’t want to ruin your wedding suit, Woohyun” Dongwoo, who was once his doctor- now both his and Sunggyu’s most trusted friend, said while fixing the younger’s suit and tie. “I’m getting married” Woohyun said with a soft chuckle.’Yes, I’m going to marry the love of my life, my best friend, my everything’ he thought with a huge smile plastered on his face.

 

He was fixing his hair when Dongwoo knocked on his door and peeped in. “Hey, you doing good?” the doctor said, casually walking towards the younger. He smiled nervously at Dongwoo, fidgeting in front of the mirror. To the young boy, Dongwoo was like the brother he wished he had. After being discharged from the hospital, Dongwoo kept in touch with Sunggyu and Woohyun even though he didn’t need to. To both Sunggyu and Woohyun, Dongwoo was their guardian angel, sent at the right moment, very kind and understanding.

 

“If it makes you feel any better, Sunggyu looked horrible too. I dare say he’s more nervous than you are!” the doctor joked, successfully breaking a smile on the younger’s face. It was true, even during making preparations for the wedding, Sunggyu was frantic. “I want it to be perfect for you. We only get to do this once and I wanna make sure it’s flawless” the elder had said although Woohyun told him countless times he wanted a small and simple wedding but Sunggyu being Sunggyu. The younger boy knows, his soon-to-be husband wants the best for him, “You deserve nothing lesser than the best” Sunggyu always said.

 

He smiled looking at himself in the mirror, he never thought he’d be getting married for all his life and here he was, wearing a white tuxedo, hair styled neatly. Dongwoo turned the younger so that they were facing each other. He took a long look at Woohyun whom he considered his little brother, an affectionate smile on his face. “I’m so proud of you, Woohyunnie” the doctor said, tears threatening to fall. He really was, he saw how Woohyun had struggled and built himself back up.

 

_“Help! Help!” he heard a boy scream frantically. Dongwoo quickly ran to the boy with a few other nurses. “What happened?” the doctor asked the young boy. “H-he slit his wrist and lost his consciousness. I r-rushed here a-as fast as I c-can” the young boy said, panicking when the nurses stopped him from entering the operating room. He could clearly hear the young boy trashing and screaming from behind the doors._

 

_The doctor attached numerous wires to the unconscious boy on the table, ensuring the boy continues breathing and his vitals stable. He saw the multiple slashes up the boy’s arm and instructed one of the nurse to get a couple bags of blood for transfusion. He also saw multiple bruises and cuts on the boy’s body and cringed seeing a few fresh bite marks. He stitched the boy’s deep cuts and went through other necessary procedures and left the nurses to take care of the rest._

 

_He walked out of the operation room and saw the young boy pacing around nervously. “H-how’s Woohyunnie? Is he going to be okay?” the young boy asked, looking at him for answers. “He’s going to be okay. Don’t worry.” he said calmly. He saw the boy starting to calm down and he walked back to the doctors’ resting area. Dongwoo ruffled his hair, remembering the bruises on the young boy he treated just now. He got up and went to the young boy’s assigned room and stood at the end of his bed. ‘Who would do such things to such young boy?’ he sighed to himself._

 

_After a few days, the boy woke up. His heart sank seeing the trauma the boy was in. ‘Why did no one do anything to help this poor boy?’ he thought to himself, seeing how scared the boy, Woohyun, was. After he calmed the boy down, he told the young boy who brought him in that he was awake. The past few days the young boy stayed at the hospital after his work ended. Sunggyu was his name from what the nurses told him. Every time he saw the boy, he was sleeping on the chair, waiting for his friend, Dongwoo assumes, to wake up._

 

_After learning what happened to Woohyun from Sunggyu, he looked at Woohyun who was sleeping in Sunggyu’s arms, ‘What did the boy do to deserve all this?’ Dongwoo sighed sadly. After Woohyun was discharged, Dongwoo paid Woohyun’s medical bill knowing his situation, he made sure to always keep in touch with the young boy. Throughout the years, they grew closer and Dongwoo was always there for both Sunggyu and Woohyun._

 

He still remembers nights when Sunggyu would call Dongwoo in the middle of the night because Woohyun had nightmares and panic attacks. He saw Woohyun slowly growing. Before he knew it, a stray tear rolled down his cheeks. Woohyun wiped away his tear. “I should be the one crying not you, Dongwoo” Woohyun joked, a bright smile displayed on his face. Dongwoo chuckled at Woohyun’s remarks and hugged the young boy close to him.

 

Sunggyu on the other hand was down the isle, waiting nervously for the love of his life. His cousin, Myungsoo, was trying hard to make sure the elder doesn’t freak out. “What if he’s having second thoughts, Myungsoo? What if he doesn’t want to marry me?” the elder said, hands fidgeting nervously. Myungsoo gave Sunggyu a long look, having a hard time processing what the elder said. “You’ve got to be joking me, Sunggyu. Do you even hear yourself?” Myungsoo shook his head in disbelief. “Don’t worry, I bet he’s as nervous as you are. He’ll walk down the isle to you. You’re his everything, remember that.” the younger said, squeezing the elder’s shoulder in assurance.

 

Myungsoo saw how both Sunggyu and Woohyun struggled together. He came to visit every now and then when he has some free time. He still remembers the first time he slept over at their place and to see where they are now, how much they’ve grown, Myungsoo couldn’t be happier for both of them.

 

_“G-gyu” he heard soft cries from Woohyun’s room. The cries got louder and he got out of his bed and went straight to Woohyun’s bedroom. Sunggyu was trying to hold down a thrashing Woohyun, making sure the younger doesn’t hurt himself. “Woohyun. Hey hey. I’m here, Woohyunnie.” Sunggyu called for the younger, caressing the younger’s cheeks. Woohyun’s eyes shot open and he cried in Sunggyu’s arms. Myungsoo couldn’t do anything, he was completely stunned._

 

_He’s heard of the nightmares Woohyun gets, he knew from Sunggyu what Woohyun went through. He was shocked by what he saw, it was very terrible seeing Woohyun thrashing helplessly because of the nightmares. He sat at the end of Woohyun’s bed, watching Sunggyu calm the younger down with all his might. He saw Sunggyu was at verge of tears too. Who wouldn’t? Myungsoo himself was trying hard not to cry._

 

_After Woohyun fell asleep, they both walked out of Woohyun’s room, leaving the door open. Sunggyu sat on the couch, hands raking through his hair. He felt helpless, Myungsoo felt it. “I can’t even do anything for him, Soo. I felt so helpless every time it happens.” the elder said, sobbing silently. He hugged Sunggyu close, offering him all the comfort he can give to Sunggyu._

 

_“You did everything you could for him, Sunggyu. You’re the strongest person I know. Trust me, what you did, the way you fought your tears for him, no one could do it for him.” Myungsoo said, rubbing the elder’s back._

 

While he was comforting the elder, the grew silent and everyone stood up looking at the door. When the door opened, Sunggyu’s breath hitched. The love of his life, standing at the other end of the isle looking breathtakingly gorgeous in the white tuxedo they picked together. He felt like the whole world stopped moving, all that mattered at the time was just them both. Dongwoo walked Woohyun down the isle, handing him to his future husband.

 

“H-hi” the younger said nervously, mesmerised by the elder in a matching white tuxedo. Sunggyu spotted the slight blush decorating his little love and smiled inwardly at the cuteness of his love. “Hi yourself, beautiful” Sunggyu said nudging the younger’s side causing Woohyun to blush brightly now.

 

They turned facing their wedding officiant. “You are all gathered here to witness the day Kim Sunggyu and Nam Woohyun join their lives and live in the union of marriage.” the officiant started but all Sunggyu could focus on was the fact that he and Woohyun are finally getting married. All the struggles, the hardship they went through together. Sunggyu was glad he caught Woohyun back then at the park.

 

“I believe that both the grooms wrote their own vows.” Both Sunggyu and Woohyun stood facing each other, hand in hand.

 

 

“Nam Woohyun, I met you when we were young and you kept coming to halmeoni crying. The day we went to the carnival when we were kids was the day I promised to myself, witnessed by the sky that I’ll always protect you. Woohyun, my love, you were first my best friend and then my lover. There is no one other than you that I’d rather stand here with today. You are such a bright person, always kind and compassionate towards others. Nam Woohyun, I fell for your beautiful heart, your breathtaking smile, I fell in too deep that there’s no backing out for me. There is no one I’d want to spend my entire eternity with but you. I can only see you in my future. I promise with my life that I’ll always love you and cherish you, in sickness and in health, during your ups and downs, I promise to always be your pillar, the shoulder you can lean on.” Sunggyu slid the wedding ring on Woohyun’s ring finger.

 

 

By the end of Sunggyu’s vow, Woohyun shed a tear, touched by his love’s promise. “Now, Woohyun you may recite your vow.”

 

 

“Kim Sunggyu, I never thought I would be standing at the end of the isle with anyone. I’ve never imagined falling in love with anyone but you kept proving me wrong. Here I am, standing at the end of the isle, facing the love of my life. I fell deeply in love with you, your generous heart that only knew to give and never expect anything in return. You accepted me as I am, the imperfect me and I am eternally blessed for that. Kim Sunggyu, you showed me that everyone deserved to be loved, no matter their history. I am glad you caught me in the park 3 years back because you gave me hope, gave me a reason to fight for my life. I can’t see myself without you in any future for you are made for me and I was made for you. I promise with my life that I’ll always love you and cherish you, in sickness and in health, during your ups and downs, I promise to always be your pillar, the shoulder you can lean on.” He slid the wedding ring on Sunggyu’s ring finger, happy tears trailing down both their cheeks.

 

“The world has witnessed your vows to each other, your promise to each other bound by the rings on your fingers. May the wedding rings you exchanged today remind you that you are surrounded by endless love. And so now, by the power vested in me, I pronounce you husbands. You may kiss.” At that, Sunggyu held Woohyun’s chin up, looking deep into the younger’s eyes. The kiss was innocent, lips on lips. Every emotion conveyed in their simple kiss, tears of joy streaming down their cheeks.

 

“I love you, Hyunnie.” the elder said loud enough for the younger to hear him. They rested their foreheads together, both smiling widely, they are now officially husbands. “I love you too. Forever with you, only you,” the younger said, hands stroking his husband’s cheeks.


End file.
